FMR - Fuck My Rommates

Here's the situation: I live in a house with a bunch a shit heads. As a whole, they are dirty ass hippies who suck at life. I should have never moved into a house with these degenerates. They are filthy, stupid, yet see themselves as "progressive" for being dirty fucking

I fucking can't stand this selfish pice of crap

So, I have been roomming w/ a friend of mine from college for one month because I just moved to the City. She is so selfish, moody, argumentative, and seems to be lacking decent human courtesy. First of all, this is NYC, so the walls are paper thin, I can hear every noise

Cheap and Lazy

I knew you were a strange person going into this. We were friends in high school, and you had strange habits. You only wore black because you had social anxiety and apparently if you wore colors, you would be noticed (never mind that you were known school-wide as the

Stop using MY PlayStation 3

Look, I understand you're bored, you're stir crazy. But...you have an android smart phone, you have DVD's galore, a TV in YOUR room, a Super Nintendo, a Nintendo 64, and a gaming computer. You waltz into MY room whenever you feel like it, to play MY PlayStation 3 that I

Freeloading

You two have made me angry since I moved in, and I've said nothing. You eat my food without telling me, you drink my beer, you have the SAME SHIT in the freezer you did a year ago! Why the fuck do you think its OK to take up 95% of the freezer space when two other people also

•••••

» Girls

GOD HELP ME :(

Posted on June 9, 2011 by admin Posted in Annoying, Garbage, Idiots, Lazy, Mess | 1 Comment

I was once a very content girl who owned a house with her boyfriend of two years. Yes, we got behind on a few bills, but we ate canned food and made due. It just so happened that your boyfriend broke up with you, you didnt want to move back home after college, and you were a friend of mine who had ignored me since you got the boyfriend who just dumped you, but why not let you move in, help with bills, and rekindle our friendship? How bad can it be? HAHA! I dont know if you realize this, but we have payed a 650 dollar deposit, a 400 pet deposit for our two potty trained dogs, and furnished everything in this house from the washer and dryer you use to the bed you sleep in and dresser you fill your clothes with. We have put thousands of dollars into this house, so your third of rent here DOES NOT even give you the right to disrespect us like you do.

You leave lights on, you run a load of laundry for one shirt, the only thing you (or should I say your dads credit card) has bought for this house is a bottle of dishsoap and one role of toilet paper in the past four months. Everything else you think youre entitled to…which would be fine…were sharing people. IF you did not act like a spoiled selfish brat. You have never swept or mopped our floor, you have washed one load of dishes, but you say thats ok because you put them away when theyre dry. You have had your parents over to stay the night here 4 times and we dont even have a spare bedroom since youre LIVING in it! You have never taken out the trash and youve been asked to when you overflow it. We try so hard to be courteous to you and make you comfortable and you are so unappreciative. SO you bought an 8 week old puppy who has been shitting and pissing on our floor for the past week. The last I check you did not pay the pet deposit that we will probably not get back. As I speak you are napping in the bed we bought with your MOM who is here for three days while I am babysitting a little boy AND your untrained puppy while your ass is HERE. GOOD GOD. Youve been apartment searching and now youve found one THANK GOD but have asked for half of this months rent back. You never say please, thanks, or excuse me. Im so sorry that you will have to learn responsibility the hard the way, but most of all I feel sorry for your puppy when your childish ass is out of here.

Share and Enjoy

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Google
  • Reddit
  • Add to favorites
  • Email
  • RSS

TAKE A SHOWER. DO SOME LAUNDRY. VACUUM THE FLOOR.

Posted on May 25, 2011 by admin Posted in Food, Garbage, Idiots, Lazy, Mess, Nasty | 1 Comment

My roommates bedroom is disgusting. They have dirty dishes, old food, opened canned food, garbage, dirty diapers, old moldy baby bottles, and puke rags everywhere. Not to mention the dirty clothes piled up. I saw a pair of her underwear with a dirty pad stuck to it the other day. These people are ridiculous. They don’t vacuum, EVER. They don’t put the dishes in the sink, they don’t do laundry, and they don’t THROW AWAY GARBAGE AT ALL.

I really wouldn’t care if it weren’t for the smell. To get to me bedroom, I have to walk past theirs. It smells rotten. I don’t know how they can live in it. The dirty laundry alone smells like death.

It’s starting to get bad though. There’s a decent sized pile of dirty clothes OUTSIDE their bedroom door. Across the hall from their bedroom door is their bathroom. Garbage piled two feet high off the counter and on the floor behind the toilet. Dirty pads and tampons just sitting in a clear garbage bag on the floor. The smell is worse than the bedroom.

To make things 10 times worse.. Their baby is only three months old. They have HIM living like that and it isn’t acceptable. I mean, I have him most of the time just because they’re lazy, and pathetic… but really. I’m the only person who cleans the kitchen.. and the only room that actually smells GOOD in this house is mine. Thank god my bathroom is attached only to my bedroom. I don’t like to be in any other room of the house but my own.

I can’t take this much longer.

Share and Enjoy

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Google
  • Reddit
  • Add to favorites
  • Email
  • RSS

On the crazy scale of 1-10 I hate my roommate with a 46!

Posted on April 27, 2011 by admin Posted in Annoying, Food, Idiots, Weird | 3 Comments

Do you know what’s better than being woken up by an R&B song from 2001 at 6:45? I do. Being woken up by an R&B song from 2001 at 6:45 plus the overhead being turned on and my roommate wearing her squeaky shower shoes while she dances and sings.

My roommate thinks she is Muslim. She was born and raised a Christian. But nowadays she has decided that she must be covered at all times because she is now Muslim.

My roommate is a crazy stalker. She stalks her old boyfriend (broken up for five months now) and even though he has threatened that he will get his parents involved. She saw him the other day and nearly died. He is ugly and has little potential.

My roommate clips her toenails. On my carpet.

My roommate only listens to R&B from the late 90′s and early millennium. There is nothing worse than TLC and Whitney Houston.

My roommate eats Cheez-its like it’s her job. The white cheddar ones that stink like her foot warts.

She sexts boys she has never met.

My roommate is a pathological liar. She always takes my favorite scarf and then says that she doesn’t even like it.

My favorite quality about my roommate is that she is built like a kiwi bird. Look them up.

Share and Enjoy

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Google
  • Reddit
  • Add to favorites
  • RSS

Couldn’t Be Bothered

Posted on April 26, 2011 by admin Posted in Annoying, Food, Garbage, Idiots, Lazy, Mess | Leave a comment

To begin, this is my third roommate. I don’t know what it is, but I have had very different sorts of roommates (and by that I mean they were all entitled bitches from the suburbs but have slightly different opinions about what constitutes a mess and how to be a tolerable person to live with). My current roommate, lets call her Ella, is no better than the last two but she has some very special qualities that make her perhaps more annoying.

Firstly, whenever she has her boyfriend over she feels the need to make a huge mess and never clean it up nor put the 283928 beer bottles she has accumulated over the evening in the friggin recycling she insisted on, she never does dishes and feels that unless the dishes are 99% hers she shouldn’t have to (and yet when they are I still somehow end up doing them), she waits until the last minute to get me her rent check and yet when she needs money for the cable I must pay it to her immediately with no notice, she clearly doesn’t like my boyfriend and feels the need to be incredibly awkward and borderline rude to him every time he is over, she takes up all of the storage and never has offered to move anything to make room for my things including storing some strange sort of work-out pod in the hall closet leaving no room for winter coats, she leaves a trail of crumbs, batter, pasta, and whatever else wherever she goes, and she feels the need to leave ME passive aggressive notes about having the heat on IN THE FRIGGIN WINTER.

Tonight she “confronted” me about leaving the heat on downstairs (that barely works) and I told her about my grievances to which she looked at me like I had accused her of killing puppies and proceeded to say that me cleaning was a “recent thing” by that she must have meant that I didn’t clean the two weeks I didn’t live here yet. UGH!!! I wish her boyfriend would get his ass in gear so she can move out already and he can deal with her insanity. I HATE ROOMMATES!!!

Share and Enjoy

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Google
  • Reddit
  • Add to favorites
  • Email
  • RSS

The Princess and the Pea

Posted on April 25, 2011 by admin Posted in Annoying, College, Weird | 3 Comments

My Roommate is very sensitive to sound and light apparently, because she can only sleep when I’m asleep. She essentially is try to get my agree to not be awake in the room past midnight (this is in college btw). I realize being a light sleeper sucks, but she really has no right to kick me out of the room. She has to realize being up at midnight, or even later is normal in college. If I were playing loud music or talking on the phone I would get it, but having 1 dim light on and turning the pages in textbooks is a bit extreme sensitivity.

She wants me to cater to her sleeping habits, but she won’t cater to mine. The only nights that I stay up past 1 are when I have a major test or paper. I feel that is reasonable, I shouldn’t be exiled out of my room is that situation.

Share and Enjoy

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Google
  • Reddit
  • Add to favorites
  • Email
  • RSS

« Previous   1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8   Next »