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My roommate was new for the Fall semester. This was her 3rd college. The last one she was in, someplace in Florida, she had gotten a full ride to for playing volleyball but lost it because she got caught drinking and her mommy and daddy couldn’t pay for it anymore (boo freakin’ hoo, bitch; it’s your own damn fault). The first time I met her, I came back from somewhere and she was already getting ready to go out and her friend was using our shower, something that she didn’t even ask me if it was okay. Then a knock came on the door and a whole parade of obnoxious freshmen came in (I could tell they were freshmen because they were waaaay too dressed up to go out). I turn around and she has a huge bottle of Vlad vodka in her hand and she’s mixing it with Gatorade and Turkey Hill tea. As someone who is only 20 and an education major, needless to say I was pissed. But oh no, that wasn’t even the tip of the iceberg. The following weekend I went back home to work. When I came back Sunday afternoon, there were empty pizza boxes thrown on MY BED and other crap tossed on MY DESK. She also left our bathroom a complete mess and threw her dirty nasty towels on the floor. When I confronted her about the alcohol privately (and when she was actually SOBER for once), she promised me she’d get rid of it. She never did. Now, I’m not a tattletale, I’m really not. But when it comes to MY education and MY future that is coming out of MY pocket, that’s when I get pissed. I went to the housing director and told her, who met with my room mate and told her to get rid of the alcohol. My room mate (who we will call “ginger bitch”), was apparently “so sorry” and would get rid of it “right away.” Nope, she didn’t. And, she never DID apologize to me, she just ignored me and pouted. Then when I would either be trying to sleep or study she would make a point of blaring her loud music or inviting her friends over, one of which CLIPPED HER TOENAILS NEXT TO MY TOOTHBRUSH. I was at the end of my rope the night that happened, but more so when ginger bitch came back after partying and was so intoxicated that 2 big guys had to hold her up. She came falling back into the room calling me a “bitch” and a “c**t” and threatening to kill me. At that point I was done. I called the campus police, but sadly she got away before they could find her. I later found out that she had alcohol poisoning that night and had to be rushed to the hospital. I honestly wish they would have just let her die. Oh, and the housing department? Didn’t do a damn thing until I had sent almost 3 different emails to them complaining about her and how awful she was. Their response? it would take a whole FUCKING MONTH to get her ass evicted. It was either that or I’d be the one to have to move out, even though I didn’t do a DAMN THING WRONG. Eventually, though, she decided to move out on her own and live with a bunch of her party slut friends. A few months later, I heard through some people who went to high school with her that she spent most of her time when she lived with me bitching about what a “little snob” I was and “how weird I am; all she does is study!” Bitch, it’s COLLEGE. Grow the fuck up!!
My roommate was new for the Fall semester. This was her 3rd college. The last one she was in, someplace in Florida, she had gotten a full ride to for playing volleyball but lost it because she got caught drinking and her mommy and daddy couldn’t pay for it anymore (boo freakin’ hoo, bitch; it’s your own damn fault). The first time I met her, I came back from somewhere and she was already getting ready to go out and her friend was using our shower, something that she didn’t even ask me if it was okay. Now, don’t get me wrong; I have no problem with her going out on the weekends to party or getting ready in our room, but just ask first before letting someone I don’t even know use our shower. Then a knock came on the door and a whole parade of obnoxious freshmen came in (I could tell they were freshmen because they were waaaay too dressed up to go out). Which wasn’t really a big deal. What WAS a big deal was when I turned around and saw she had a bunch of huge bottle of Vlad vodka that she was mixing with Gatorade and Turkey Hill tea. As someone who is only 20 and an education major, ya know a major where getting caught with alcohol underage pretty much guarantees you will never get a teaching job? Yeah, I was annoyed. But oh no, that wasn’t even the tip of it. The following weekend I went back home to work. When I came back Sunday afternoon, there were empty pizza boxes thrown on MY BED and other crap tossed on MY DESK. I also found out that she had been caught smoking weed IN OUR FUCKING ROOM. Seriously? Again, I have no problem with weed, but if you’re gonna do it, do it OFF CAMPUS. She also left our bathroom a complete mess and threw her dirty nasty towels on the floor. When I confronted her about the alcohol privately (and when she was actually SOBER for once), she promised me she’d get rid of it. She never did. I’m not a tattletale, I’m really not. But when it comes to MY education and MY future that is coming out of MY pocket, that’s when I get really mad. I went to the housing director and told her, who met with my room mate and told her to get rid of the alcohol. My room mate (who we will now refer to as “ginger bitch”), was apparently “so sorry” and would get rid of it “right away.” Nope, she didn’t. And, surprisingly she never DID apologize to me, she just ignored me and pouted. Oh, and she also wrote, “you fucked with the wrong person” on her Facebook wall right after she talked to the housing director and defriended me. Then when I would either be trying to study or sleep she would make a point of blaring her loud music or inviting her friends over, one of which CLIPPED HER TOENAILS NEXT TO MY TOOTHBRUSH. I was at the end of my rope the night that happened, but more so when ginger bitch came back after partying and was so intoxicated that 2 big guys had to hold her up. Her one friend, the one who kept using our shower without my permission, pulled me aside and told me not to call the cops, that they had it “under control.” Ginger bitch had come falling back into the room calling ME a “bitch” and a “c**t” and threatening to kill me. “No,” I told her friend, “you do NOT have this under control. You lost control of this situation the minute you let her have that first drink tonight. I’m getting the RA and calling the cops.” At that point I was done. Her friend and the 2 guys picked up the ginger bitch, who was now stumbling towards the door and went to sit on the couches outside of our room. I called the campus police and ran down the hall to the RA’s room, but sadly they all got away before they could find her and arrest her. I later found out that she had alcohol poisoning that night and had to be rushed to the hospital. I honestly wish they would have just let her die. Oh, and the housing department? Didn’t do a damn thing until both my mom and myself had sent almost 5 different emails to them complaining about her and how awful she was and that I should not have to put up with this bs. Their response? it would take a whole FUCKING MONTH to get her ass evicted. It was either that or I’d be the one to have to move out, even though I didn’t do a DAMN THING WRONG. Eventually, though, she decided to move out on her own and live with a bunch of her party slut friends. A few months later, I heard through some people who went to high school with her that she spent most of her time when she lived with me bitching about what a “little snob” I was and “how weird I am; all she does is study!” Bitch, it’s COLLEGE. Grow the fuck up!!
My roommate was new for the Fall semester. This was her 3rd college. The last one she was in, someplace in Florida, she had gotten a full ride to for playing volleyball but lost it because she got caught drinking and her mommy and daddy couldn’t pay for it anymore (boo freakin’ hoo, bitch; it’s your own damn fault). The first time I met her, I came back from somewhere and she was already getting ready to go out and her friend was using our shower, something that she didn’t even ask me if it was okay. Now, don’t get me wrong; I have no problem with her going out on the weekends to party or getting ready in our room, but just ask first before letting someone I don’t even know use our shower. Then a knock came on the door and a whole parade of obnoxious freshmen came in (I could tell they were freshmen because they were waaaay too dressed up to go out). Which wasn’t really a big deal. What WAS a big deal was when I turned around and saw she had a bunch of huge bottle of Vlad vodka that she was mixing with Gatorade and Turkey Hill tea. As someone who is only 20 and an education major, ya know a major where getting caught with alcohol underage pretty much guarantees you will never get a teaching job? Yeah, I was annoyed. But oh no, that wasn’t even the tip of it. The following weekend I went back home to work. When I came back Sunday afternoon, there were empty pizza boxes thrown on MY BED and other crap tossed on MY DESK. I also found out that she had been caught smoking weed IN OUR FUCKING ROOM. Seriously? Again, I have no problem with weed, but if you’re gonna do it, do it OFF CAMPUS. She also left our bathroom a complete mess and threw her dirty nasty towels on the floor. When I confronted her about the alcohol privately (and when she was actually SOBER for once), she promised me she’d get rid of it. She never did. I’m not a tattletale, I’m really not. But when it comes to MY education and MY future that is coming out of MY pocket, that’s when I get really mad. I went to the housing director and told her, who met with my room mate and told her to get rid of the alcohol. My room mate (who we will now refer to as “ginger bitch”), was apparently “so sorry” and would get rid of it “right away.” Nope, she didn’t. And, surprisingly she never DID apologize to me, she just ignored me and pouted. Oh, and she also wrote, “you fucked with the wrong person” on her Facebook wall right after she talked to the housing director and defriended me. Then when I would either be trying to study or sleep she would make a point of blaring her loud music or inviting her friends over, one of which CLIPPED HER TOENAILS NEXT TO MY TOOTHBRUSH. I was at the end of my rope the night that happened, but more so when ginger bitch came back after partying and was so intoxicated that 2 big guys had to hold her up. Her one friend, the one who kept using our shower without my permission, pulled me aside and told me not to call the cops, that they had it “under control.” Ginger bitch had come falling back into the room calling ME a “bitch” and a “c**t” and threatening to kill me. “No,” I told her friend, “you do NOT have this under control. You lost control of this situation the minute you let her have that first drink tonight. I’m getting the RA and calling the cops.” At that point I was done. Her friend and the 2 guys picked up the ginger bitch, who was now stumbling towards the door and went to sit on the couches outside of our room. I called the campus police and ran down the hall to the RA’s room, but sadly they all got away before they could find her and arrest her. I later found out that she had alcohol poisoning that night and had to be rushed to the hospital. I honestly wish they would have just let her die. Oh, and the housing department? Didn’t do a damn thing until both my mom and myself had sent almost 5 different emails to them complaining about her and how awful she was and that I should not have to put up with this bs. Their response? it would take a whole FUCKING MONTH to get her ass evicted. It was either that or I’d be the one to have to move out, even though I didn’t do a DAMN THING WRONG. Eventually, though, she decided to move out on her own and live with a bunch of her party slut friends. A few months later, I heard through some people who went to high school with her that she spent most of her time when she lived with me bitching about what a “little snob” I was and “how weird I am; all she does is study!” Bitch, it’s COLLEGE. Grow the fuck up!!
There are 3 of us, yet you make no effort to pull your weight in our lovely little flat that you treat as a pigsty. Instead, you shut yourself in your room (the biggest room in the house which we let you have out of the kindness of our hearts, while we live in rooms half the size of yours), and when you emerge you out of your habitat you go in to the kitchen, eat my food, drink my milk, make food and leave your shit, unwashed pans and plates in the sink and sit on the sofa watching the most irritating and unfunny TV letting out the most annoying laugh that makes me want to drop your dirty pans and plates onto your lap. It never occurs to you to buy toilet paper, washing up liquid or hand soap. You would never vacuum the flat and if you did expect praise by making a big song a dance about it. Last Sunday when I spent an hour cleaning the over, you didn’t even say thank you. Every week we remove a huge hunk of nasty hair from the drain because your too much of a fucking idiot to use the hair filter. You won’t take out the rubbish or recycling, all of which rendered you 100% useless in my eyes.
I put of with all your lazy, and irresponsible shit, but when I begin to feel violated, is where I draw the line.
We all knew you that you have poor hygiene, after you admitted that you didn’t use the hand soap in the bathroom and that you just use rubbing gel instead (yeah, like that stuff works) and I also notice that you never brush your teeth and use about 1 tube of tooth paste per year (which you dare to keep separately in the cupboard, like I will take your toothpaste? Bitch, I don’t want your fucking paste) and now you have a habit of firstly, taking my other flatmates brush on holiday with you, because you’re too fucking dumb to know which is yours, and now, because again, YOU ARE A DUMB BITCH, have started to use my tooth brush, because mine is blue and yours is blue (wow, crazy, even though mine is/was (I binned that mother fucker) dark blue and yours light blue). Revenge was mine after years of this shit and I went HAM on your dental equipment, I decided once and for all to make you eat dirt and I laid a good amount of my personal saliva on YOUR toothbrush.
Look at me now, bitch.
Dear Shitty Roommate,
You’re not a Christian just because you think “God” blesses everything in your life when it goes your way, but you blame the universe and other people when it doesn’t. That just makes you a pathetic bitch.
I may spend a lot of time at my internship and subsequently out of the suite, but I still live here. I pay for my half of the room and I’d appreciate it if I got a freaking HALF and not a dusty little corner because you want to put your bed in the middle of the room. At least ask before you go and rearrange the room I invited you to live in out of desperation.
Eat the damn applesauce your Mommy keeps buying you. 14 are too many.
Grow a set and stop bitching when people don’t like something you say. Grow up. You’re entering the adult world here, you can’t just whine when people say something about your piggish, stupid, ignorant Facebook status.
Your tattoos are ugly.
I hate you,
Roommate
I hate my roommate. We were friends before we moved in together, but now i just can’t wait til the day i graduate so i never have to lay my eyes on him. Here’s why:
1. He thinks he’s smarter than everyone. However, his arrogance only appears behind closed doors. To everyone else, he would put up a front of a humble student trying his best at school. To their backs, he would degrade them and brag about how he doesn’t even have to study half as much as them and he can still “beat” them.
2. He smells, but he doesn’t think he does. He also has horrible oral hygiene. He would go to sleep at 4am and wake up at around 10 or 12 and not brush his teeth because he “slept at 4 and its just 12. [his] teeth are still clean.”
3. He constantly seems to have the need to correct everything I do.
4. He has weird nipples, but never puts on a shirt when he’s in the house.
5. He likes to put up an image of how he’s on a journey of becoming a better person, but in reality his character is
6. He likes to put on a false pretense that he has more friends than he actually does. He would tell me that he’s going to hang out with “someone.” Out of habit, I usually respond with, “oh who?” This leads him to reply, “just someone.” He only has like 3 other friends that he hangs out with that do not live in the house with us.
7. He would always say,” You do that to everyone and i can tell they don’t like it.” And if i ask “who’s everyone?” A guaranteed ” just everyone” response will follow.
8. He’s the biggest hypocrite i have ever met.
My Roommate is an Art Student who is very talented but a complete neurotic mess. ( Who I will call Tina)
He is messy , lazy, rude, cheap, and a total ass!
He barely pays his bills. He refuses to buy checks! (so he can write checks to pay his bills or even to do a bill pay.) So he first demanded that my other roommate and I write checks for him. (this is to display his stupidity)Then after we got tired of it and we shut him down, he bought money orders that cost 6 dollars each instead of buying checks.
He uses up our supplies and instead of buy exactly what he used, he buys some cheap version. If it isn’t a cheap version he buys the tiny version.
He was rising used dishes and stated that he washed them. So I told him he has to use soap in order for the dishes to be washed. So now he half asses it and there are always chunks of food stuck on the dishes and now whenever we use a dish we always have to wash them before use, because we cannot trust him to clean the dishes properly.
My other roommate “Mos” and I take out the trash and recycling and he does nothing but create messes. When I call him on it he says , “oh well just ask me to do it”. When you live with other people you should pull your own weight. No one should have to ask you or tell you to do something! You don’t live at home any more! Your parents are not going to clean up after you!!!
Any time I call him on any of his behavior he always pouts and tries to make me feel like an asshole for trying to get him to live up to the terms he agreed!!!!
Every time he walks down the hall he stomps and it sounds like he has 15 medicine balls attached to his hips that are bouncing all over the walls and the floor. Unless he is trying to be sneaky then he is a stealthy as a mouse.
Whenever he comes home it is always a fucking show! Screaming at the top of his lungs and stomping his feet like it’s the damn “Tina” show! He is very effeminate and has a very girly voice, which often becomes very shrill once he becomes excited! Anything triggers his excitement. The dog, a fly, my roommate “Mos”, me, the mail, etc.
It’s like living in Pee Wee’s play house and everything is the secret word!
He is so needy and has to constantly has to have someone’s attention.
He leaves his door open all the time and when someone comes home he jumps all over them and forces them into conversation!
He is always sick and constantly gets me sick! I am half blind in my left eye and have ocular issues whenever I get a respiratory infection! I am only asking for basic things when your sick cover your mouth and if you aren’t going to cover then close your bedroom door! He refuses to do any of that! I have had to spend 600+ dollars on the opthamologist in the last two months!
I wish he would move away! Yes, Tina move the fuck away or die or go play in traffic! Just leave my house you are the epitome of patheticness!
My roommate is the biggest, most unfounded pity party ever. She’s 23 and has never dated anyone, which I don’t have an opinion on or actually care about at all. And yet she mentions it constantly at the slightest opportunity. It was an absolute nightmare while I was dating my ex – I literally couldn’t mention anything about him without getting a wistful sigh and a “that must be really nice… you’re so lucky…” Since then, it’s still annoying. There are four of us here, all single, but if she’s whining and one of us reminds her that no one else here as an active love life either, she says “Well at least you’ve HAD boyfriends! Guys won’t even speak to me. It’s probably because I’m so fat and ugly.” No, I’m pretty sure it’s because you’re crazy.
FYI: She’s 115 pounds, max, wears size 2 pants and still fits into shirts she had when she was in middle school. If she lost any weight she’d float away on the breeze. And if guys don’t find her attractive, it probably has more to do with the fact that she still wears shirts she had in middle school than the way she actually looks.
It’s probably better for the guys that they don’t date her though, because if the way she treats my cat is any indication (“Why doesn’t he love me? I just want to pet the kitty, but he won’t let me! Why can’t you make your cat love me? I need some kitty cuddles and he keeps walking away! Why is the kitty biting me?! Your cat hates me!” and so on), she’d be the clingiest, most needy girlfriend ever. I just hope it doesn’t happen while I live with her, because if she’s this bad now I don’t want to know what she’s like after a break up.
I room with an all knowing bitch. She is antisocial and NEVER leaves the room to go anywhere. Everytime I come back to the room at 3 or 4 in the afternoon she is sleeping until around 8 with the lights out. I have to leave the room to get anything done. Due to her nocturnal sleeping habits she is up till the early hours of the morning pounding on her laptop. What is she doing? FACEBOOK CHAT! Every night that’s all she does! She has got to go! Not only is she anti social, but she does not shower regularly and our room often wreaks of BO. I don’t know why she thinks she only has to shower every 3 days and use natural deorderant but that habit of hers has to change. I sometimes get nautious when she smells like complete shit. I need a new roomate!
My roomate is an annoying stupid C**t! First of all, we share a room and a bathroom. She has her boyfriend live with us, and when i have to go to work at 9, shes having sex LOUDLY with him all night! Then when she has to get up, she turns on her horrible music at 4 am, and all the lights and slams every door possible. When she leaves she doesnt lock the door (EVER). Then she complaines about everything LOUDLY to herself ! Any time she watches a movie, be it at 2am she plays it volume full blast on her LAPTOP! (Hello has she heard of headphone…its this amazing invention that you put in your ears in order to hear things so others don’t) We have a tiny fridge FILLED with all her food…she takes up soo much space, everythings spread out and she doesnt have that much stuff. Any time she walks through the door i get so irratated i just cant stand it. She leaves shit stains in the tiolet hair in the drain, so much as it looks like a woolie mamouth bathed. She’s always in the room with her boyfriend…not ever ear plugs could block her sex noises. One time i woke up to her having sex yelling “OH SHIT, OH SHIT PUT IT IN MY ASS! OMFG I WANT HER TO DIE !!
I’m going to get straight to the point. I moved in with you, because the prior living situation I had was pretty bad (or so I thought.. it was NOTHING compared to the crock of bullshit you put me through on a daily basis).
I’ve known you since high school, but we went our separate ways shortly after we graduated, and I hadn’t heard from you in years. Just recently, we re-acquainted with one another, and all seemed well.
You began hanging out with me and my current roommate, and it seemed like we all got along well. We knew you had two spare rooms open, and in our desperation to move, had discussed the possibility of approaching you about renting those two rooms to the both of us. Long story short, we moved in about 2 months later.
Within the first two weeks, I realized we may have made a big mistake. It was very evident to me that you have a severe alcohol problem. In fact, you’re a full-blown alcoholic, violent fits of rage included!
One month into living with you, you get so belligerently drunk that you try to start fights with our mutual friends – for NO reason.
I’m approached to calm you down, and in doing so, you punch me. This results in the both of us getting into a fist fight, in which you got the beating of your life. And yet you STILL act like an ass. You STILL get drunk on a regular basis, and you STILL try to fight everyone. To make matters worse, your friends seem to have sympathy for you, and think it’s perfectly reasonable to hide the results of your horrible, drunken escapades.
After all of this, you have the AUDACITY to approach me, and ask me why “things can’t go back to the way they used to be”, and yet you wonder why I avoid you! I’m so uncomfortable here that I head straight to my room when I’m home, spend all of my time IN my room, and I’m uncomfortable anywhere else in the house. I feel responsible for my friend whom moved in with me, and feel horrible that he has to go through this. His first impressions of living with you were your outrageous acts, and you getting your ass royally kicked by myself.
The only reason I’m still here, is because I’m on unemployment, and can’t afford to save or move out of this nightmare situation. Now, just to reinforce my feelings, here’s a list of some other, non-alcoholic-rage-induced problems that you drag into our lives:
• Even though we pay you rent a good two weeks prior to the first of the month, it’s STILL somehow late. In fact, you probably don’t know this, but I receive e-mails from our property management company alerting me to a past-due balance every week. The only reason I haven’t brought this up, is because we’re simply subletting from the company, and YOU are the head on the lease. It doesn’t affect us.
• You’d think that our old roommate moving out due to your actions, and your inability to pay things on time would be a wake-up call. Instead, you move one of your IDIOT friends into our house whom makes less than I do on unemployment, and eats everything in sight.
• Let’s not forget the fact that you SLEPT with the girl I was taking out, and had the nerve to bring her over to the house constantly, REPEATEDLY disrespecting me. Somehow, you can’t get it through your thick skull, that you’ve disrespected me beyond belief. After all of this, I find out from your friends that you do this regularly.
• The final and last bit that has made me grind my teeth regularly, is the fact that you seem to think you have to fight everyone. You’re 5’3, 120lbs. You are pathetic. Stop trying. I’m passive, and I whooped your ass. What do you think someone twice my size, and more aggressive is going to do to you?
As soon as I find a job, you’d better believe that both myself, and our other roommate will be out of here faster than you can blink. I have come to loathe and despise you, and yet you STILL try to guilt-trip me. You suck as a person.
– Sincerely, Your Very Angry and Over-It Roommate.